Friday, September 22, 2006

Crescent moon spotting

Yahoo News:
Iran will employ an aeroplane to spot the crescent moon that signals the start of Ramadan to ensure there is no dispute over when the Muslim fasting month starts, Iranian media have reported.
The BBC version, perhaps...
Iran will defy US sanctions on the purchase of spare parts for its ageing fleet of aircraft by using an aeroplane to spot the crescent moon that signals the start of Ramadan, reports our Tehran correspondent Frances Harrison.

There have been hundreds of plane crashes in recent days, all caused by America, but this will not stop the brave, culturally diverse and highly amusing people of Iran - who also happen to have a wonderful history - from celebrating their religion.

Look into my eyes - Iran doesn't want nuclear weapons. Iran doesn't want nuclear weapons. Iran doesn't want nuclear weapons.

8 Comments:

Anonymous Clematis Zionist-Piggmonkey said...

Ooooh, can anyone play?

BREAKING NEWS:

Twenty 'Killed' by Death in Indonesia.

Orla Guerin reports from Gaza.

"Sectarian violence in southern Indonesia has claimed the lives of 20 people, police allege.

"The 'dead' were believed to have been 'killed' by 'swords', according to police, and it is believed, say police, that the dead 'were decapitated', police claim. 'Their heads had been really wiped out', claimed police.

"Witnesses claim that the 'dead' were attacked by armed militants chanting 'God is Great' and carrying Korans. But everyone I spoke to claim that Israeli troops have been seen in the area, which is 90 per cent Muslim, and no Muslims have been seen in the region for years.

"It is not known who carried out the 'attacks', but police claim it was the work of 'Islamic militants'. It could also have been carried out by local youths or even by George Bush as part of his so-called 'war on terror', claim locals.

"The region has a history of violence. In 2004, rampaging Christian mobs attacked a mosque, killing ten innocent Muslims. In 2005, a bomb attack in a Catholic church killed 45. The identities of the bombers are not known but it is believed the attack was sectarian and was carried out by local youths or criminal gangs. Last month, a priest was killed by a shooting.

"Police have recently claimed to have unearthed a number of alleged militant training camps in the jungle. Inspector Knackerami of the Djarkata police said that 'jihad training camps are everywhere and the Islamic terrorists are killing on a daily basis' but, apart from regular rocket-launches from the heavily armed jungle compound where I am staying, I can see no evidence of any militant activity. Anywhere.

"Israel and George Bush claim that so-called jihad camps are being set up to arm young men for a so-called terrorist war against the occupying occupiers in occupied Palestine.

"But jihad is a word meaning 'peaceful, spiritual struggle' anod most assuredly not 'religious war', which this clearly is not anyway. Because I know it is not a religious war, okay?

"Sheikh Abu Galloway, a local community leader, tells me over a candlelit dinner that his people are being victimised. He blames Israel for the attacks on Christians.

"The Zionists come here in their thousands. They are stealing our land and drinking our children's blood," says the Sheikh, tears of anguish rolling down over his pleasingly soft, avuncular features.

"I tell him I feel his pain and ask myself how Israel will explain this to the international community. But I tell my friend the Sheikh that am determined to remain impartial despite this bloody destructive death and misery inflicted on Indonesia by Israel and its sponsor the USA."

12:46 am  
Blogger DFH said...

Heh.

I particulalry like "Inspector Knackerami of the Djarkata police"

10:42 am  
Blogger Man in a shed said...

They could save themselves the fuel and use 'physics' instead to tell them when the new moon will be.

Although a friend of mine told me about Islamic physics - where you have to avoid making incorrect observations I assume ( like the Earth going round the Sun). Perhaps their variety of physics is less reliable. They're going to have a hell of a time making their own atomic bomb if thats the case.

1:42 pm  
Anonymous Verity said...

man in a shed - "They're going to have a hell of a time making their own atomic bomb if thats the case."

Not at all. Iran's probably already got a bomb. (The Iranians are smarter than the Arabs, though.) But really, all they have to do is copy the open West, where everything's available to see.

I hope their ramadam plane crashes. It's time they started noticing that everything about mohammadenism brings bad luck.

2:27 pm  
Anonymous Verity said...

rama-dama ding-dong. Sounds like a pop song from the 70s.

1:02 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Erm... planes crashing?

Like Lockerbie you mean?

Like the World Trade Center you mean?


I didn't realise that BA and United Airlines were part of Iran's fleet.

Fancy that!

7:21 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Erm... planes crashing?

Like Lockerbie you mean?


Brought down by Muzzies.

Like the World Trade Center you mean?

Brought down by Muzzies.

10:57 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

As Uncle Osama said: What goes around comes around.

And fuck Lockerbie - aren't we friends with Qadaffi now?

1:31 am  

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